No matter how old I get, there’s something about summer that stirs anticipation in me—a longing to slow down and savor life at a gentler pace.
Maybe it's embedded in the DNA of our school systems, where summer breaks came as the reward after nine grueling months of hard work. Or maybe it’s the memory of warm creek water inviting play or spontaneous swims in a neighbor’s pool. Whatever the reason, when the weather warms and days lengthen, vacation and fun naturally come to mind.
But for many couples, summer vacation can quickly shift from a season of rest to a source of stress. Misaligned expectations, packed itineraries, or the beautiful chaos of traveling with kids can turn what should be a time of renewal into one of tension.
So how do we guard against that and pursue a vacation that refreshes not just our bodies, but our marriage and family?
1. Plan Together
Vacations are more enjoyable when both partners feel seen and heard. One spouse might assume they know what the other wants and take the lead in planning, only to feel hurt or frustrated when their effort isn’t appreciated or embraced. Before making any concrete plans, take time to discuss your individual hopes for vacation. What feels restful? What sounds fun? What memories do you want to create as a couple or family?
Collaborative planning helps ensure both spouses feel invested—and it lays the groundwork for connection long before the bags are even packed.
2. Prioritize Presence Over Productivity
It’s tempting to cram as much activity into a vacation as possible—trying to make every moment count with sightseeing, excursions, and events. But often, we return home more exhausted than when we left.
Instead, choose presence over performance. Build in time for rest. Get up early to enjoy a quiet coffee together while the kids sleep in. Plan a low-key beach day. Hire a sitter and carve out a date night. Some of the best moments on vacation are the unhurried ones—the ones where connection is not just possible but prioritized.
3. Be Generous with Grace
Even the best-laid plans go awry. Flights get delayed. Cars break down. Kids melt down. The weather turns. These disruptions can breed stress and conflict if we let them. But they can also become unexpected invitations to grace, patience, and deeper connection.
When things go wrong, take a breath. Remember: the goal of vacation isn’t perfection—it’s presence. Sometimes the detour is the divine setup, a gentle nudge from God to slow down, lean in, and connect more fully.
Summer vacation is a gift—more than just a break from work. With intentionality, grace, and a heart for connection, it can become a sacred space for renewed love, shared laughter, and spiritual growth in your marriage.
But for many couples, summer vacation can quickly shift from a season of rest to a source of stress. Misaligned expectations, packed itineraries, or the beautiful chaos of traveling with kids can turn what should be a time of renewal into one of tension.
So how do we guard against that and pursue a vacation that refreshes not just our bodies, but our marriage and family?
1. Plan Together
Vacations are more enjoyable when both partners feel seen and heard. One spouse might assume they know what the other wants and take the lead in planning, only to feel hurt or frustrated when their effort isn’t appreciated or embraced. Before making any concrete plans, take time to discuss your individual hopes for vacation. What feels restful? What sounds fun? What memories do you want to create as a couple or family?
Collaborative planning helps ensure both spouses feel invested—and it lays the groundwork for connection long before the bags are even packed.
2. Prioritize Presence Over Productivity
It’s tempting to cram as much activity into a vacation as possible—trying to make every moment count with sightseeing, excursions, and events. But often, we return home more exhausted than when we left.
Instead, choose presence over performance. Build in time for rest. Get up early to enjoy a quiet coffee together while the kids sleep in. Plan a low-key beach day. Hire a sitter and carve out a date night. Some of the best moments on vacation are the unhurried ones—the ones where connection is not just possible but prioritized.
3. Be Generous with Grace
Even the best-laid plans go awry. Flights get delayed. Cars break down. Kids melt down. The weather turns. These disruptions can breed stress and conflict if we let them. But they can also become unexpected invitations to grace, patience, and deeper connection.
When things go wrong, take a breath. Remember: the goal of vacation isn’t perfection—it’s presence. Sometimes the detour is the divine setup, a gentle nudge from God to slow down, lean in, and connect more fully.
Summer vacation is a gift—more than just a break from work. With intentionality, grace, and a heart for connection, it can become a sacred space for renewed love, shared laughter, and spiritual growth in your marriage.